Tahoe Triple Crown

How do you you set out for new adventures or decide what your next challenge will be? For the last 5 years, I’ve been eyeing the distant view of 3 of the 4 highest peaks in the Lake Tahoe Basin and decided hiking these peaks would be my Summer of ‘17 challenge…

Known to locals as the Tahoe Triple Crown, Freel Peak (10,881 feet), Jobs Sister (10,821) and Jobs Peak (10, 633) are a one-day, a 12-mile loop that “bag” 3-of-4 highest peaks in Lake Tahoe. This summer, I set out to achieve this goal, not on my own, but with Pasquale (10) and Nico (8).

How did we accomplish this challenge? EAS – energy, attitude and spirit.

Energy: We prepared our packs with enough Cliff bars, clementines, peanut butter sandwiches and LOTS of water (almost 7 liters!). Attitude: We were able to find the right attitude through our conversations, music and laughter. Spirit: Before each trek to Freel, Job’s Sister or Job’s Peak, we said a prayer and asked for God to watch over our journey, help us embrace His majesty and protect our steps.

How did we conquer our fear of the unknown?

Freel Peak from Armstrong Pass is well-marked and having climbed this route the last 2-years, we breezed through the 5.25 miles, 2700’ elevation gain in 3 hours and 30-minutes. The first of the Tahoe triple crown was “in-the-bag!”

The first steps of the unknown and our journey to Job’s Sister (10,821) began down a sandy slope but a very well traveled 1.25 miles to the peak. The only way to reach Job’s Sister is through Freel Peak or Job’s Peak…there are no other options. This portion of our hike was the easiest and quickest, 41-minutes.

The second of the Tahoe triple crown was “in-the-bag!”

Feeling great and excited to reach Job’s Peak, we started our climb down Job’s Sister…and all of a sudden, we looked over the edge. That is when fear, doubt and worry set in. There was NO TRAIL. There were NO HIKERS. There were 2 OPTIONS: turn back and retrace our steps, or pray for the confidence to take the first step toward Job’s Peak…we knew it was far away, but we didn’t know it would be 2 miles down Job’s Sister, across many snow banks and up a sandy slope to reach the triple crown peak.

At this point in our journey, we found the courage to take one step after another and before each switchback, agreed on the direction we would head. The trek from Job’s Sister to Job’s Peak was the most treacherous. The heat started to become a factor, there was no cloud coverage and minimal trees. Staying properly hydrated was really important and when we crossed a snow patch, the boys found reprieve in the snow, by cooling off their heads, making snow angels or having a snowball fight.

With Job’s Peak in sight, our motto of, “So close, but still so far…” turned from motivation to reality once we reached Job’s Peak…after 6 hours and 30-minutes, the third peak was, “in-the-bag!”

After we signed the logbook and took a short rest break, we knew there was still a lot of terrain to cover…we had to get down Job’s Peak and a walk back to our car parked at the Freel Peak trailhead. After an additional 2-hours, 4 miles and slightly over 2000’ elevation descent, we finally reached our car! Wahoo!!

How was the drive home? Pasquale asked the question, “Mama, what’s our challenge for next year?” Not sure yet, just living the dream of Summer '17!

From one mom to another…today is your day! Make it the best and become the strongest mom you can be.

Hugs,
Niccole

What Is The One Thing You Want More Than Anything Else?

What is the ONE thing you want more than anything else? Are you willing to work for it AND wait for it? We live in a world of instant gratification. We want to lose weight…now. We want to be debt free…today. We want to be happy…forever.  We want joy, peace, love, passion and more. But the reality is that in order to achieve any of these things, we need to practice them, have patience to wait for them, and be willing to persevere.

This week, our daughter celebrated her 11th birthday and was given the thumbs up by her ballet instructor that she was ready for pointe shoes. Pointe shoes are the most eagerly anticipated rite of passage for a young dancer. When a dancer wears her pointe shoes, she can proudly declare, “I AM a ballerina!” To earn this rite of passage, it took Arianna 8-years of dedication, hard work and discipline. Her love for ballet motivated her to achieve this accomplishment. After trying on more than 15 pairs of pointe shoes, Arianna found her perfect pair, and when she did, she smiled from ear to ear while tears swelled up in my eyes…

How can you put a plan into action to achieve the ONE thing that you want more than anything else?

Practice

Practice helps you prepare for when it matters most. In this interview, Michael Jordan says it best, “I never feared my skills, because I put in the work." If you want to lose weight, practice eating less and exercising more. If you want to be debt free, practice spending less. If you want to be happy, practice comparing less, judging less and practice forgiving more.

Patience

Patience, like most things in life, is a learned behavior. It is not something we inherit or are entitled to. It is a daily commitment to take a deep breath, and embrace our surroundings…good or bad. In Romans 12:12 we are reminded, “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.” If you want to lose 10 pounds, be patient when you lose your first pound! If you want to be debt free, be patient when your credit card balance decreases. If you want to be happy, be patient when things don't go your way.

Perseverance

Perseverance is steadfastness to get back up when we’ve been knocked down. Many people believe that we can only get better at things when we fail and learn from our failures. What do Michael Jordan, Steve Jobs, Albert Einstein, Walt Disney, and Oprah Winfrey have in common? They all failed and were all told they weren’t good enough, but through their perseverance, they were able to achieve great things.

If we want to lose weight, we should eat healthy and exercise. If we want to be debt free, we should wait 3-days before we make our next purchase. If we want to be happy, we should take the time to find what makes us truly happy.

Arianna achieved what mattered most to her…pointe shoes! How did she do it? Through practice, patience and perseverance. As you go into 2017, ask yourself, “What do I want to achieve?” We have an expression in our home, “Believe…and you WILL achieve!” I have the upmost confidence in your ability to achieve the one thing that matters most to you…do you?

Be+positive, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
Niccole

10 Ways To Become The Strongest Mom

Being a mom is awesome!  From my heart to yours, Happy Mother’s Day!  Every day overflows with opportunities to love, teach and guide our children, whether they are newborn or have children of their own.  Occasionally, I pat myself on the back and say, “Wow, you handled that situation well!”  And the other 364 days of the year, I shake my head and say, “Oh, boy…I wish I would have handled that differently.”  But the great news is that every day, we have an opportunity to become the strongest mom.  So what are you doing to become the strongest mom? 

As I thought about that question myself, I reminisced about this past year and created this short video of my Top 10 Memorable Moments:

And after the laughter and some tears, I thought about 10 Ways To Become The Strongest Mom:

1. Show compassion instead of passing judgment.

2. Practice humility instead of being prideful.

3. Love unconditionally instead of rejecting.

4. Listen attentively instead of interrupting.

5. Be accountable instead of blameless.

6. Forgive frequently instead of condemning.

7. Communicate openly instead of suppressing.

8. Apologize habitually instead of making excuses.

9. Validate effort instead of criticizing the outcome.

10. Embrace the chaos instead of seeking perfection.

Becoming the strongest mom begins with a desire in my heart and willingness to try.  If I quit and throw in the towel, how can I expect my children to go through life any differently?  Maybe this list doesn't resonate with you.  If it doesn’t, challenge yourself and think about the ways you can become the strongest mom.

What is my litmus test to know if I’m heading in the right direction?  When one of my kids smiles at me and says, “Mama, you didn’t yell todayJ”

Sometimes it is hard to stay positive in a sea of negativity, or when you are dealing with grief, loss or disappointment.  Instead of being paralyzed by the pain, surround yourself with loving memories of the first time you held your child in your arms and find a way to make your heart happy this Mother’s Day.

Sophocles once said, “Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life.”  My children are my anchors, and mean the world to me.  On this Mother’s Day, I celebrate them, for giving me the opportunity to be their Mom.

Fondly,
Niccole

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Free self-protection class at White Rock YMCA for girls and parents Sunday April 17

A number of Dallas-area parents and their daughters have attended an innovative predator prevention program where girls learn to recognize and escape dangerous situations and fight back where necessary.  The girls are trained by age group starting at age 7 and above.  The program seeks to take a subject no one wants to talk about and present it in an interesting and entertaining way so that people will talk about it.  According to the parents and girls who have already attended, it works: parents and their daughters say the program is fun, valuable, and empowering.  Follow up surveys show that the program actually changes both parent and child behavior in ways that make girls safer.  

The course lasts a maximum of one hour for younger children and two hours for older children.  The course at the YMCA will be taught by several instructors: an emergency room doctor and toxicologist, an attorney and former rehabilitation counselor in a maximum security prison, a researcher in developmental biology, a seven time national fighting champion (TKD - men), the current reigning national fighting champion (TKD - women), and a former university title IX coordinator (she is teaching the age 14+ class — high school students and parents should find her particularly interesting as they consider college choices).  

The course is free and scheduled for April 17 starting at 3 pm for younger girls, and 4 pm for ages 14+, at the White Rock YMCA.  Girls attending must be accompanied by a parent.  

More information about the training is available at the links below, or contactginger@securehighered.com.     

To sign up for the YMCA training:
https://securehighered.com/wrymca/

Information about the training at the YMCA:
https://securehighered.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/P3-YMCA-flier-NEW.pdf

General FAQs about the training program:
https://securehighered.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/03/SHE-P3-FAQs.pdf

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Tri. Tri. Tri Harder.

Last weekend, our 7, 8 and 10-year olds competed in the Baylor Tom Landry Sunny Kids Tri. This year, Arianna bumped up to the Youth Senior group and completed a 200Y swim, 6-mile bike and 2K run. When I speak of Arianna, I hardly ever speak of her as being an “athlete”. Boy, am I wrong! She IS an athlete and as her mom, I need to try harder and give her the credit she deserves.

Why do parents need to try harder?

Being a parent is a title, but also an active job and responsibility. Many days, it’s hard to get out of bed, or have the energy to make it through the day, but if you quit, and rely on someone else to do your job, your child will suffer. When parents try harder, children witness that parents struggle too, just like they do!

How can parents try harder?

Be your child’s role model.
In our home, one of our mantras is, “Don’t ask someone to do something you wouldn’t do yourself.” If I want my kids to speak kindly, respect others and work hard, then I need to model this behavior. I don’t do these things well, but I try harder everyday to lessen my harsh tone, listen when my children speak and push through the exhaustion. Charles Barkley said it best in this Nike commercial.

Be your child’s advocate.
To be an advocate for your child, start by understanding the situation, what you hope to achieve and your approach to finding a solution. Whether your child needs you in the classroom, in a social setting or relationship, children need to know that their parents will advocate (not make excuses) for them. When parents try harder, children become empowered and learn how to take on their own challenges and solve their own problems.

Validate your child.

Validating your child means that you listen to what they say, without passing judgment, criticism, or interrupting them when they share their thoughts and emotions. Validation isn’t about superficial praises or reward system; it’s about speaking the truth about your child’s effort or accomplishment. Most importantly, it means that you don't always have to agree with them. When you try harder, your child will become confident in sharing thoughts and build self-esteem. 

Learn from my mistakes. Parenting is exhausting, but you can try harder. Your children learn from the example you set, as well as how you advocate for them and validate their feelings. 

You are capable, you are confident and you are becoming the strongest mom.

be+positive,
Niccole

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Traditions Preserve Past, Present and Future Generations

As a believer, Holy Week is a very special time of the year and culminates with Jesus’ resurrection on Easter Sunday. If you celebrate Easter, join me as we chant,

Christ is Risen!
Indeed, He is Risen!
Christ is Risen!
Indeed, He is Risen!

Growing up, my family attended St. Joseph’s Ukrainian Greek Catholic Church in Chicago. On Easter, the Priest would spread incense over the empty tomb, and lead the congregation with this Ukrainian chant. This tradition has been passed down from generation to generation.

What are traditions?

Traditions are repeated behaviors or actions. Some examples of traditions might be birthday and holiday celebrations, reunions, family trips or outings.

Why are traditions important?

Traditions preserve our cultural or religious heritage.
In our family, we celebrate both Italian and Ukrainian/Polish traditions for Christmas by eating fish and making vereniki, borscht and kapusta. We have also introduced new traditions like singing, “Happy Birthday” to Jesus on Christmas and reenacting The Last Supper. These traditions, old and new, help our children understand our cultural heritages of the past and preserve them for future generations.

Traditions teach values.
Ask your child, “What traditions do you think are important to our family?” Their answer might alarm, frighten, or pleasantly surprise you. As early as 18-months old, children can learn important values from the traditions you implement. Life is busy and an important tradition for me is to greet my children and husband with, “Good Morning and I love you!” If I fail at everything else that day, at least my family hears, and knows, that they are loved!

Traditions strengthen family relationships.
Since 2008, our family has participated in the Dallas Turkey Trot and have been trotting the 5K and 8-mile course ever since. It is fun way for us to get some exercise, encourage one another and raise our arms high as a family when we cross the finish line.

Traditions give you something to look forward to.
Every summer, our family hikes the Sierra Nevada Mountains. Whenever our children hear the song, Locked Out Of Heaven, or look at photos of the mountains, they get so excited. Each hike starts with one of our children leading us up the mountain. This summer tradition has empowered our children to conquer rugged terrain, overcome long and treacherous climbs and taught them how to push through quitting points.

Hopefully you have traditions important to your family, or are inspired to start some. Traditions preserve cultural heritage, teach values, strengthen family relationships and give each of you something to look forward to!

be+positive,
Niccole

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Do You Want To Run A Half Marathon?

Tuesday morning, I dropped our kids off at school and before my 8-year old crossed the street, I opened the window and asked him, “Hey Pasquale, do you want to run a half marathon with me on Sunday?” He thought for a moment, smiled and said, “Yeah, let’s do it!” So Pasquale and I made up our mind to run the Dallas Rock ‘n Roll Half Marathon together on March 20th.

You might be thinking I am crazy to throw out an idea like that, or you might be thinking, you go mama! Yes, it was a bit of a crazy idea, but he is certainly capable of finishing a half marathon. Part of parenting is about challenging our children, and building their confidence when they aren’t sure they can do it.

Challenging Your Child
As challenging as running is physically, I would argue that long distance running is even more mentally taxing. Take whatever challenge your child is facing and make and effort to overcome it. Encouraging and coaching your child through their challenges will build inner strength and self-value. Inner strength will help your child push through trials and tribulations. In Romans 5:3-4 we are reminded that, “We also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope.” Isn’t it time we start challenging our children?

Building Your Child’s Confidence
From the moment your child takes his or her first steps or walks across the stage and receives a diploma, our job is to build their confidence, not make them believe they are better than someone else. There is a distinct difference between a child’s confidence and arrogance. A philosophy in our home is, “Don’t ask someone to do something that you wouldn’t do yourself.” As parents, we lead by example and grow in our abilities so that our children become capable of growing in their abilities. As an individual’s abilities grow, so does their confidence.

Pasquale hasn’t “trained” specifically to run 13.1 miles. But over the course of the last 10-weeks, he has racked up: 35-hours on a wrestling mat, 25-miles of biking, 20-hours of swimming, 12-miles of running, 15-hours of Tae Kwon Do training, 10-hours of football and sleeps 10-hours/night. No doubt he will be challenged to finish a half marathon, but when he crosses the finish line, he will be confident in his abilities.

Make today great! Get out and challenge your child, build their confidence and build a strong family.

be+positive,
Niccole

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Childhood Obesity And Weight Loss

Are children really at risk for becoming overweight and obese? The Centers For Disease Control and Protection (CDC) have some eye opening facts. According to the CDC:

•       Childhood obesity has more than doubled in children and quadrupled in adolescents in the past 30 years.

•       The percentage of children aged 6–11 years in the United States who were obese increased from 7% in 1980 to nearly 18% in 2012. Similarly, the percentage of adolescents aged 12–19 years who were obese increased from 5% to nearly 21% over the same period.

•       In 2012, more than one third of children and adolescents were overweight or obese.

Recently, our family had a conversation about weight loss. Our 7-year old is conditioning for the Texas USA Wrestling State Tournament on Feb. 27-28. At his last tournament, he weighed 57.5 pounds and competed in the 61-pound weight class. He was at a huge disadvantage and asked the question, “Mama, what do I need to do if I want to compete in the 56-pound weight class?”

So I asked him a lot of questions about why he wants to compete at that weight class and helped him think through an exercise and nutrition plan to help him achieve his goal. This conversation is not only an individual goal, it is a family affair and as a family, we will support Nico to reach his goal.

What is Nico’s purpose? Nico wants to wrestle kids who are closer to his actual weight.

What is Nico’s plan? Here are three pillars to help Nico achieve his weight goal.

1. Exercise More.
In addition to his after school activities, Nico and I run 1-mile before school three days/week. This early morning routine kick starts his metabolism and helps him go to school focused and prepared for the day.

2. Eating Parameters.
Nico will reduce his treats after dinner to every other night. With the exception of two evenings, he will finish eating by 7pm, have reduced portions of simple carbohydrates like pasta and potatoes and will eat well-balanced meals. Eating well-balanced meals will lead to less snacking throughout the day. Snacks will be measured out for portion control and responsible eating.

3. Reduce Sugar.
When the kids looked in the refrigerator, they noticed a new brand of yogurt and they asked, “Mama, why did you switch brands?” I explained to them that after comparing the two yogurts, this brand has 4-5 grams of less sugar. The majority of kids (and adults!) consume too much added sugar. This means sugar found in fruit juices, sodas, and processed foods, not natural sugars found in fruits and vegetables.

This plan isn’t just about a State Wrestling Tournament, it is teaching our children life lessons. If we, as parents, aren’t around to have these conversations with our children, whom will they turn to and how will they learn the right way to approach weight loss? Make exercise and nutrition a family affair and together, let's build a strong family.

be+positive,
Niccole

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Are You A Hypocrite? I Am!

According to Merriam-Webster, a hypocrite is a person who acts in contradiction to his or her stated beliefs or feelings. Are you a hypocrite? I am. How so? I share with many people that I do not believe in scales, yet, every day for the past 6 days I have found myself on a scale. Why? I have a goal to lose 3 pounds and the scale holds me accountable. I encourage people to not eat after 8:30 pm, yet, every now and then, I find myself eating a late night family dinner or dabbling into the dark chocolate sea salt covered caramels. Why? Because a family dinner is more valuable than a curfew and my love for sweets gets the best of me. So admittedly, I am a hypocrite in two pillars (fitness and diet) of my life that mean a lot to me. 

What do you do when you find yourself being a hypocrite or in a hypocritical situation? Own up. Take the high road. Ask for forgiveness.

Maybe if our culture were slow to judge and quick to show compassion, admitting you are a hypocrite would be a whole lot easier. But the fact is, admitting you are a hypocrite takes courage and a willingness to be accountable.

The bible teaches us in Matthew 7:5, “You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Maybe your day needs to be more about removing the plank in your own eye before condemning the speck in your neighbor's, friend's, or loved one's eye.

I am perfectly imperfect. Aren’t you?

How do you move forward? Take the hand that is closest to you, embrace it, and never let go of it, so that together you can climb your way to the top of the peak...even if it is Freel Peak in Lake Tahoe, 10,881 feet above sea level.

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Proper Form in Exercising and Parenting

As parents, the majority of our responsibility is to teach our children. Manners are expected, but can be inconsistent. Fostering independence requires patience, and matures over time. Healthy living is a lifestyle, not a magical transformation. Despite frustration or setbacks, you try and demonstrate doing life well as consistently as possible. Since you want your children to learn well as they go through life, why do you not do the same for yourself, especially when it comes to exercising?

As a former certified personal trainer, teaching clients the right way to exercise was a priority. Many people do not use proper form and form really matters! Use proper form and see the transformation take place.

What is proper form?
Proper form is performing an exercise correctly. It is positioning your body properly, using a range of motion specific to the exercise, and having the correct amount of resistance to create tension for the muscle(s) being exercised.

Why is proper form important?
Proper form helps you establish a fitness foundation. Proper form is an instrumental component to the overall success of any workout program.

Great form gives you great results. When an exercise is performed with proper form, you can actually feel the muscle at work, increased blood flow delivers more oxygen­‐rich blood to the muscle(s) at work, and you build muscle. That muscle then goes to work to burn body fat, even when you are resting.

Proper form minimizes injuries. When exercises are performed with proper form, you condition/train muscles that act as secondary joint stabilizers. And proper form can help reduce your risk of overuse injuries. Of course, you should always check with your physician before beginning any exercise program.

Remember to listen to your body. If you feel any discomfort, or unnecessary pain specific to the exercise movement, stop immediately, check your form, and make any necessary adjustments, including reducing the weight or modifying the movement to make it easier for you.

How do I perform exercises with proper form?
Find a good instructor or instructional video so you understand the proper mechanics and get the greatest benefit from the time and money you invest.

Focus on the specific muscle the exercise targets. If you are unsure, research what muscle should be engaged while performing the exercise. Then, as you perform the exercise, think about that muscle, and feel the muscle engage without unnatural stress/tension/pain.

Proper form is about quality, not quantity. Quality training will positively influence your progress. Your goal is to perform as many repetitions as possible with good form, and the last 2­‐3 repetitions should be challenging, but not impossible. Your repetitions should not cause you to break proper form.

Maybe after reading this, you cut and paste proper form when exercising to parenting. These tips can be used not only in the gym, but everyday in life, to help you become the strongest mom.

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Thank you, Moms!

The Holiday Season is upon us. Moms, for all that you do, "Thank you!" As you go about your day running errands and taking care of your families, remember, you are special, you are amazing and you are loved!

Black Friday Deal Starts Today! 
Purchase our 30-minute fitness videos for yourself or a mom you love this Holiday Season. Now through Nov. 30th use coupon code: BLACK15 and save 50%. Order @ strongestmom.com.

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Entertaining Kids

The next time you find yourself chauffeuring your kids around town, consider taking along age appropriate activities to keep them entertained between pit stops. Our toddler’s favorite activity is a lunch box filled with trucks, cars, motorcycles and choppers. This age appropriate activity promotes language development, creative play, counting and sharing (with siblings and other children). The lunch box is portable and keeps all his belongings in one place. As a mom of four, one of my pet peeves is finding random things in the car, bathroom, closet and countertop. A little planning and preparation helps moms stay ahead of the game and keep kids occupied!

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Child Advocacy or Helicopter Parenting?

As a mom of four, I want the best for my children. Over the years, I have witnessed, been guilty of, or been affected by helicopter parenting.  As a result, I have learned that there is a clear distinction between advocating for your child and doing for your child what he or she can do for themselves. The following are two stories used to differentiate between helicopter parenting and child advocacy.

Story 1: A parent wants their child to play on an undefeated sports team. The parent emails the coach, sends a resume of the child’s athletic accomplishments, the parent’s job title, how much money they donate to the school, and tells the coach their child would be a great addition to the team. In the email, there is no mention of the child’s interest to play the sport.

Story 2: A parent picks up their child after school. The child says a classmate is causing trouble and it’s a repeated behavior. The parent coaches the child how to stand up and speak up for what is right. If the behavior continues, the parent suggests gathering the facts, scheduling an appointment with the teacher/counselor and address the situation to find an appropriate solution. 

Parents that hover, or are “helicopter” parents:

• Desire to be hyper involved in their child’s life. 
• Use ego, pride, financial or social status to influence their child’s future.
• Coddle or entitle the child’s behaviors and protects them from consequences.
• Have difficulty letting go.
• Prepare the path for the child.

Parents who advocate for their child:

• Cultivate independence and self-sufficiency.
• Train their child to be goal oriented and have a disciplined work ethic.
• Teach problem solving and critical thinking skills.
• Encourage the child’s decision-making abilities and resourcefulness.
• Prepare the child for the path.

What are the effects of helicopter parenting?

In 2011, a study of 300 students by Terri LeMoyne and Tom Buchanan at the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga found that students with “hovering” or “helicopter” parents are more likely to be medicated for anxiety and/or depression.

Moms, wouldn’t it be great if you were discharged from the hospital with a manual on how to be an advocate for your child? I think so. Parenting is one of the hardest jobs in the world. The more you advocate for your child, the more likely your child will overcome adversity and be mentally prepared for the future. Advocate for your child by understanding the facts, devising a plan (and a back up plan), learning from the past, and looking at the big picture.

I love being present in the moment. Every day is an opportunity for me to be an advocate for my child: socially, academically, athletically or relationally. My job isn’t to fix it for them, but rather to equip them with the tools they need to become self-reliant adults. 

be+positive,
Niccole

P.S. Last week was busy. I found myself in offices and buildings, advocating for all four of our kids. When Friday rolled around, I was ready for an early evening, good book and glass of wine!

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